As the end of uncertainty draws nearer...

My boss knows that I have a blog, and was teasing me that she wanted to read it. If she wasn't my boss, but just was herself and I knew her in another context, it would be no problem. But as there are obviously things that I talk about on here that as my boss, I don't want her reading about (like my plans to go back to school, and the occasional nights of too much drinking), my answer was an emphatic no. I know that there are family members out there who read it, but they love me already, so I'm not going to censor myself for them.

In the world of hiding things from my boss, the time where I actually will know in detail what I'm hiding is coming closer. As I mentioned last post, I didn't get accepted to the University of Toronto. In a way, I'm glad. UofT is a behemoth of an institution, and as much as I like the idea of it because it's the closest to home for me, and it would look good on a CV, I'm more suited to attend a smaller school. I loved how personal and tight-knit Dalhousie was, and I want that again. So I'm still waiting to hear from McMaster and York, and hopefully I'll get into both. However, I really just want to go to Mac. It generally has a reputation as a science school, but their graduate English program is very good, and one of the oldest in the country. They've got good faculty for my area too, and the commute isn't onerous (a quick subway ride to Union Station, and then about an hour on the GO bus to campus). In fact, it would probably take me just as long to get to York, and it's in the same city as I am! As I heard from UofT on Monday, I'm hoping to get some kind of response from York & Mac this week as well, but it should be sometime this month.

Once I figure out where I'm going to school and have accepted, I'll have to sort out what to do about work. I want to stay on part-time (if there isn't a school regulation against it, like there was at Dalhousie), but I don't quite know how to go about it yet. Do I tell my boss soon? Or do I wait until the summer? What if they just want me to resign? I can't afford to be unemployed, so I have to tread carefully. I'll think about it as the time draws nearer & I have more information. I know that they will want to keep me on if they possibly can, but the logistics are complicated, so I don't know what will happen.

Another thing that we're waiting on this month is news about whether or not the hubby's firm is going to hire him back as a first year associate lawyer. He is nearing the end of his articling year (he gets called to the bar in June), and he should find out sometime this month if he is going to be hired back. I think that he will be. He works hard, he's smart, everyone likes him, and his firm is expanding big time (they just finalized plans to move into a new office that has room for about twice the number of lawyers that they have now). All of this bodes well for his staying on, which is what he really wants to do. He likes his firm, he likes the people, and frankly, job searching is difficult, stressful, and spirit crushing.

Once we both know where we're going to be in September, we'll pretty much be set for the next five years or so, in terms of long-range planning. That's about how long my PhD will likely take, and the hubby isn't likely to change jobs in that time, unless something comes up that we haven't thought of yet. If, however, I don't get into York or Mac (doubtful, I hope!), we'll have to go through all of this again next spring, which won't be so fun. But that's life! Every time I think to myself that maybe I should just keep working (I do really like my job), I realize that I'm not getting the kind of intellectual stimulation & excitement out of my job that I do out of grad school, and by extension, being a prof. If I don't do my PhD, I will regret it for the rest of my life, and I don't want to live with that. So back to school I go!

Our next big project, after the wedding, is finding some property to buy, ASAP. Renting is a waste of money, and as soon as we have a good downpayment, we're going to try to buy a two bedroom condo somewhere convenient. It's not my ideal entry into the housing market, but at least then you're building equity to go towards a house or a bigger condo. And it will be nice to be able to decorate, renovate, and call someplace our own. My father's biggest regret is that he didn't get into the property market earlier in his life, and I don't want to do that. Forecasts are saying that the housing market is going to go into a recession soon, which is good for us, because it might actually make property in Toronto affordable for us. When a puny two-bedroom condo is going for over $400,000, there's something wrong. It will be interesting to see what the market looks like when we're ready to get into it.

So all of the balls that are in the air are going to drop this month, and then we can get ourselves figured out and start cutting away all of the uncertainty that we've been living with for the last while. It will be nice to make some long-range plans. But for today, all my plans include are reading, painting, going to the library, and being cozy. I'm taking a well deserved day off.